Update - Monsoon Period

Henry and I were very encouraged by yesterday's visit to Dr Foo at SJMC. Originally there was no x ray scheduled but in the end, Dr Foo asked for an x ray and blood test over and above the bone treatment. As usual, Henry dug into the report after the x ray report was out. Henry was all smiles. We were very encouraged as the lesions appear less dense and diminished. Dr Foo said "Nothing much really. We just observe". Also I have been given one month free Tarceva as part of the company promotion. This will be a saving of RM8,500.00 to us! Praise the Lord!

As for the expected “finding the vein” trauma, there was none but smooth execution of the line. I praised the nurse since I felt no pain at all but she said it’s because she used a small needle. I know it’s really her expertise and God’s hand upon her as I have experienced before the nurse’s inability to find my vein! For the first time, the nurse used proper transluscent plasters to hold down the needle and other plasters to keep the line in place. It was a really good job! Oh praise God indeed!

I was a tad disappointed that it was not God’s will that I be taken off tarceva. But His word from Jeremiah 29:11 really spoke to me yesterday “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future”.

“…and not to harm you” These few words warmed my heart because God has assured me that even though I think that Tarceva is poisonous to me He will not let it harm me. Also, it just occurred to me a few days ago of his plan to let me rest in Him. It has been 6 months since my first diagnosis and during this time, I’ve learned so much, discovered God again, discovering grace again through Jesus Christ and now just learning to rest in Him. The fact that Deeper Life Seminar II will take 2 months to complete (I have recently signed up for it) shows of God’s further plans for me.

I asked Henry “What’s equivalent to winter in Malaysia that is considered a time of rest?” and his reply was “Monsoon”. Huh? But that’s destructive. How can we possibly rest during monsoon? But it’s true, just as winter is a time for trees (after harvest period) to rest before bearing fruits again, so then monsoon is a time for the sea to replenish when the fishermen are no longer at sea. It is time for the fishermen to seek shelter from the wind and seek refuge from the storm.

I feel God is saying to me to just rest in Him and find Him all over again so that when the time is right, I will go out and bear fruits for His kingdom. Just as God does not expect the sea to provide fish to the people during monsoon period, so then, I too should not expect to bear fruits during this period but just learn to rest in Him whilst I seek shelter and refuge in Him.

God has a purpose and a reason for this rest period and I should just trust in Him and not hurry God.