Under Attack Again But Standing Firm

I am so proud of Henry. He withstood the fiery darts from the evil one! Just a moment ago, Henry was on the way to submit some receipts to the Inland Revenue Board at Jalan Duta. Just as he begun his journey, a big truck whizzed passed his car and pebbles fell on the windscreen and there is a crack on the windscreen now. Yes, another one. The first hit was on 30 June 2009 during my first diagnosis at the hospital. On 30 June 2009, after we were hit by bad news from the results of the x ray, Henry went home to collect my clothes and a big pebble made a hole on the windscreen. I just looked at Henry as he told me what happened then and said "Talk about Murphy's law!"

Anyway, back to today's incident. As we was reaching IRB, a motorbike stopped right in front of him, leaving him no chance to do anything but brake and his car hit the back of the motorbike. The rider's registration plate fell off. Thank God the rider wasn't injured.

Then Henry called me and told me what happened. I was quite upset because these days I claim Psalm 91 for the family, cell group members, FBC members and those without home groups joining FBC. But Henry tells me, God still allow trials to happen as he wants them to learn from trials.

So, we prayed to God for further protection and praised Him that Henry had not changed his windscreen yet! Later, he called me to tell me that the lady at IRB was very cooperative and pleasant and if not for these 2 untoward incidences, everything would be smoothsailing. Then, it hit me that it was the devil at work again - again, at Henry's weakness regarding his car.

Normally, Henry would start to swear and curse but this time when he called me, he sounded rather calm and we prayed to God immediately. The fiery darts had no effect on him and bounced off him! If he had been in a foul mood, the lady at IRB might have picked up his grumpiness and gave him a hard time but because he was unphased and trusted the Lord, she was a blessing to him. Praise the Lord! Praise God that Henry stood firm and trusted in God and not on his own understanding!

Update

Hallelujah! I found out that "Hallelujah" means Praise the Lord! Praise the Lord! I have fully recovered from the cough I was infected with by Ethan earlier. No more cough and no more green phlegm or any phlegm! Yayy!

Over the weekend, I sprained my back carrying Ethan at a wrong angle in the middle of the night. I prayed, I rebuked and I had 2 words from God. "KEEP RUBBING". So I did. I rubbed with my hand, I rubbed with the "guasa", I rubbed and prayed and over 2 days, I got healed!

Praise the Lord!

I will be going to sjmc hospital for an x ray on 5 November 2009 to check on my status. My mum claims that there will be no more this round. Steven, Uncle Allen's friend also has a strong impression that the 1.4cm will be no more! I claim all these in Jesus' name!

Boomerang Express - Isaiah 55:11

Of late, these two verses Isaiah 55:11 and Jeremiah 1:12 have proved so powerful to me. I never quite understood why Hamir kept quoting that the word that God sent forth will not come back to him void. This really should be THE verse for this year's Vacation Bible School's "the Boomerang Express".

To me, Isaiah 55:11 is like a boomerang. We use God's words in our lives, we declare it and God will watch over His word (Jeremiah 1:12) to perform it to finally fulfil His purpose. His word when declared never returns to Him void (empty). It is used - to heal, to deliver, to save!

It has opened my eyes to understand that every word in the bible can be trusted upon and it can really be exciting as I begin to apply it to my daily life. So far, I've encouraged my close friends to use 2 Timothy 1:7, Philipians 4:6 and 1 John 5:14,15 together. It is so very powerful if you are feeling anxious, worried or fearful over something.

Fear is not from God. If we have any fears, it must be from the devil. So we apply "Do not be anxious" in Philipians 4:6 and cry out to God "Lord, you say, fear is not from you and you say that if I am anxious to pass eveything to you in prayer and petition so I pray now Oh Lord and you say in I John 5: 14.15 we can come in confidence to you and you will hear our prayers and if you hear our prayers, you will give us what we ask". And then, all we do is believe.

That is the beauty of God's grace. Because we now have right standing with God, we have become His child and we can come boldly before His throne of grace He will listen to our prayers.
That is the power of God's word. I have so much assurance that the bible says that He watches over His word to perform it. He is active, he is alert, he never sleeps, he never slumbers. Test the word. Test God if He will not perform it. This is our God.

Isaiah 55:11
"so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it."

Jeremiah 1:12 "Then the LORD said to me, "You have seen well, for I am watching over My word to perform it.""


By the way, if you didn't know VBS' theme this year, it is as follows:

Boomerang Express Scripture
1 John 4:9 Holman CSB®

"God's love was revealed among us in this way: God sent His One and Only Son into the world so that we might live through Him."

Boomerang Express Motto:

Follow!
Worship!
Live through Him!

By His Wounds by Mac Powell

Another scripture sung by another artiste, Mac Powell. Someone recorded it together with clips from Passion of Christ. When we take communion, may we remember how he died for us and the blood shed for us to SET US FREE. We now have right standing with God because Jesus paid the price. He took our sorrows, sins, infirmities. All that was upon Him and by His wounds we are healed. Sing it to Him. All Glory to God. Thank you Lord for your grace. We were so unworthy but NOW you have made us worthy because we have right standing with you. Do not just stop at the cross. See Him risen because He has given us victory over death and by His wounds we are healed.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pkMmJ6tPL2k&feature=related

He was pierced for our transgressions
He was crushed for our sins
The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him
And by His wounds, by His wounds we are healed
He was pierced for our transgressions
He was crushed for our sins
The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him
And by His wounds, by His wounds we are healed

We are healed by Your sacrifice
And the life that You gave
We are healed for You paid the price
By Your grace we are saved
We are saved

He was pierced for our transgressions
And crushed for our sins
The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him
And by His wounds, by His wounds we are healed
We are healed by Your sacrifice
And the life that You gave
We are healed for You paid the price
By Your grace we are saved
We are saved
He was pierced for our transgressions
He was crushed for our sins
The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him
And by His wounds,
by His wounds we are healed
And by His wounds, by His wounds

What can wash away my sin?
Nothing but the blood of Jesus

By His Wounds We Are Healed

Speaking out God's word is powerful because our tongue is very powerful. Proverbs 18:21, it is written:

"The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit."

When we declare God's healing words, we are sending out His word and he says in Isaiah 55:11 he says his words will not return void. He also said he watches over his word to perform it.

I found on youtube a very old clip of a young Don Moen singing this song. Sing along and sing out God's healing words upon whatever your need is because he is able to deliver you from it. Please click http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zcJR1wqCdCo&NR=1

By His Wounds We Are Healed

Surely He took up our infirmities
And carried our sorrows
Yet, we considered Him stricken by God
Smitten by Him and afflicted
But, He was pierced for our transgressions
He was crushed for our iniquities
The punishment that bought us peace
The punishment that bought us peace
Was upon Him

Chorus:

And by His wounds we are healed
By His wounds we are healed
By His wounds we are healed
By His wounds we are healed

Inner Healing

In my last blog I wrote “Now, that I’ve learned how to pray in authority and the power of binding and loosing and learning to die to self daily, discovering everyday the meaning of God’s grace that I am able to be led by the holy spirit.”

That is my lay man interpretation of what really happened in my life. Yesterday’s class in Deeper Life Seminar was about “Inner Healing”. I was amazed that what I experienced so far ties in to what Dr Lay’s advice to us. The gist of it is really the same. But he gave more explanation from his experience as a doctor working with mental patients. I even recognized another weakness within me which I knew was always there which I continue to struggle with. It is the thought of people not caring for me. When I first received a full medical report during a health check up on 3 March 2009, I was so distraught and discouraged. The doctor summarized that 70% of my body is not happy with me and a possibility of a 1st of 2nd stage cancer but then he went on to say, “I am not saying you have cancer”. With that he told me to change my lifestyle with regard my food intake. I wanted to share with someone but I didn’t know who to go to. I felt that sense that nobody would be interested. Even Henry felt the doctor had exaggerated and dramatized the results to sell his products. Eventually, I did share with friends around me and I also shared this sad perception at the CCF Alumni camp where Ps Tan Soo Inn said that statistically people have very few friends they can turn to and it gets worst when they get older! At least, God has blessed me with a sound mind and now I know the meaning of 2 Timothy 1:7 "God did not give us a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power, love and sound mind". So true!

According to Dr Lay, those who suffer from rejection problem show symptoms of fear, bad temper and starvation from God’s love. Remember, I shared I cried 3 days 3 nights upon accepting Christ? Last night, I finally I understood what happened. It took me 3 days and 3 nights to experience God’s love and to fill Him into my life! My mum and dad divorced when I was 4 years old. I always felt that it had little impact on me because as you can see, I am still bubbly and generally a happy child. But it was Henry that first recognized my weakness of not having my dad by my side which caused many troubled relationships later in life before I met Henry. I couldn’t understand why until Henry spoke it.

Finding Henry is really by divine help. Upon accepting Christ, I really became a new creation. I stopped my pub life and partying life. I sacrificed my Friday nights for bible study in CCF because I was seeking Him! I “grew up” in CCF. I complained to God how I was ever going to find a partner confined to CCF. There did not seem like anyone I was attracted to! I would talk and cry out to him daily. Yes, I was that close to Him 11 years ago. I would read books on how to date according to God’s way. I would read books on how Christians found their partners with God’s help and I prayed that mine would come soon! 8 months later, Henry came to FBC from Singapore (he had spent many years there working) because a friend of his, Mohana, recommended to him though she herself have never been to FBC! How fated is that. We had help from Cheng Yi (thanks Cheng Yi) who match made us and set up a party which I didn’t even know it was for us! Imagine, a bunch of friends coming to fellowship over dinner and games and all the while not knowing it was a little plan by Cheng Yi! Tsk tsk tsk. Dating Henry was tough because I had to date according to God’s way..ha ha! It wasn’t like staring in my face “He is your husband!” so, I had to be patient and just see how God’s hand moved. And the rest in history. But the take home is God chose Henry for me because I did not pursue him. I merely obeyed God that he is the right one for me after countless of failed relationships. And man, is He right!

Now, I am really thankful, Henry still married me despite my weakness.

Like Dr Lay said, it is God’s love that sees us through troubles in relationships. In our own strength, we have a “self” life. It is very intriguing how we developed this “self” life. It all began in the garden of Eden.

Genesis 3:7

7 Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves.

They were living in God’s glory and presence, clothed in God’s glory. They didn’t see their own nakedness. When they ate the fruit out of disobedience (a purposeful, free will decision by Adam), their relationship with God was cut off, the presence of God left them, the glory of God left them, they saw nakedness, their eyes were fixed on themselves, they were separated from the love of God, they were self centred, living for themselves, doing themselves independent of God.

Then they became afraid, they hid:

Genesis 3:10
10 He answered, "I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid."

After they sinned, they were afraid of God. Our self life doesn’t want God. We want to be independent.

This is why some of the people I love, my favourite Uncle Seng, my brother in law cringe at the thought of Christians sharing the gospel with them. It is our human nature separated from God. But God still loves them very much. It takes a long process but He knew them before they were formed in the womb like how He knew me and His hand is upon them even as I speak.

Fear replaces love. Many of us live in fear. Worst still, in our self life, we do not want to be responsible. We do not want to admit sin. We always push the blame to another. This too happened in the Garden of Eden. Adam blamed Eve. Eve blamed the serpent.

Genesis 3:12,13:

“The man said, "The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it." Then the LORD God said to the woman, "What is this you have done?" The woman said, "The serpent deceived me, and I ate."

We must confess out sin and then only God can forgive you and He will restore you like He did me. :)

Bondages/ strongholds/weaknesses can only be built on self life and NEVER on eternal life that we have received when we have accepted Christ. That’s why God’s grace is supernatural. It is God’s gift to us that when Jesus paid the price, shed His blood, we were made right with God again. All that is done in the spiritual realm not by anything we do. God loves us. He did it for us. When we accept Christ, our old self goes away and we are a new creation. Once we understand God’s grace, we just allow the holy spirit to take over to work on all our old areas, our broken areas. God works on us whether we fully understand grace or not because He loves us so much. But I must say, my faith increased once I understood what grace is. It is a daily acknowledging who God is, what Jesus has done for me on the cross, where I stand before God and before you know it, he reveals these weaknesses in me and tells me how to overcome it. Isn’t God amazing?

But if we do not cooperate with the Holy Spirit and allow our old ways to creep in, then you give that stronghold to the devil, you give an open door to the devil to work in your life. Bit by bit – contemplating adultery to adultery to broken marriages, smoking to addiction, alcoholism to addiction, anger to bitterness to resentment to hatred to broken relationships, agreeing to negative reports to accepting condition to death, pride to selfish ambition to dissension to counterfeit to antichrist, complacency to spiritual death, separated from God to eternal death in the lake of fire. You can choose that road or you can choose a road with God and receive his full blessings.

We have to die to self daily. I couldn’t quite understand what this meant. For me, it means not to do things my way but letting Him lead me. Walk in God’s love despite troubles in relationships. Initially, we can’t hear anything but my journey shows that now I can hear better! 4 months - if you are super hungry for God! Because, His sheep hears His voice. It always starts with the BIBLE because His words have life, there is power in His word, we use His word against the enemy. There is healing, there is deliverance, there is salvation in His word. It is so powerful because the Word is God, the Word is Jesus and the Word was there since the beginning, even before creation and Jesus was there at the beginning! This is our God.

Deliverance only takes a moment once we exercise our authority, after we seek forgiveness from God and forgive those who have sinned against us. Just say "In the name of Jesus, I bind you spirit of (rejection/fear/alcholism/blindness/idolatry/pride/selfish ambition/religious spirit/counterfeit/adultery/lust/anger/inferiority etc) and cast it out in the name of Jesus. By the authority given to me in Luke 10:19, I trample upon you scorpions and serpents and all work of darness working against me and I command you to go from me now, In Jesus' Name. But healing will take a longer time. Once healed, Dr Lay says, protect your mind, protect your heart. Stay close to God's word so that you will never succumb to that weakness again. Walk victoriously because Jesus has victory over death and so we are overcomers because of what He has done for us.

We are overcomers and we can walk victoriously now.

Thank You Lord. Your love never fails.

Click http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IoezWBPGRAc
Your Love Never Fails -Chris Quilala / Jesus Culture

Missions - 2nd Chance Ministry

Ever experienced a time where everything seem to be connected together, one thing happening after another – unplanned, and everything comes together and it finally hits you that God is in control? Today is a day like this!

Here’s my journey thus far:

Diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer 7 July 2009 ---> surrender to God ---> discovering God---> follow friends to discover more about Jesus & healing --->meeting different Christian groups ---> discovering prophetic words for me & Henry for missions ---> start a blog ---> discovering the power of the holy spirit ---> learning to praying victoriously ---> joining Deeper Life Seminar to be close to God --->praying for Aunty Beverly, Baby Megan, salvation for family & friends ---> discovering power of prayer & seeing miracles in other people’s lives as a result ---> re-discovering God’s grace ---> resting in the Lord & being led by the holy spirit ---> seeing a few visions ---> making a stand to be "bold as a lion" ---> seeking prayers to prepare heart for mission ---> received altar call to pray for FBC, nation & call to share God’s word to the lost ---> begin “2nd Chance” ministry 25 October 2009

That was interesting. I have not actually charted my journey thus far so this is really an interesting observation for me as well. It seems to be a journey of discovery (not self discovery but discovering God and then discovering who I am in Christ). Interestingly, there is just no thought to the sickness once I have embarked on this journey because the adventure is just too exciting to think of less important things!

Today, the only reason why I put up my hand up in church when asked if I felt a calling to share God’s words to the nations is because he has called me but I don’t know where to go from here so I really wanted Chris Abner to pray for me. Thank you so much for praying for me today.

Uncle Allen had asked me earlier to join him and a group of friends in a ministry to minister to those diagnosed with cancer which I have agreed to. Yet, I know his calling for me is also much more – to South East Asia, it has been prophesied. I know the “2ndchance ministry” will be my first taste of missions and I am very excited about it. I actually didn’t know that Uncle Allen planned to discuss in detail and actually launch the “2nd chance ministry” TODAY! I thought he and his prayer warriors were going to pray for me and we would worship and sing praises to God. But having made that altar call and having already discussed with Henry about it and having prayed about it before, I am all ready to begin this ministry with my uncle and friends. Isn’t it amazing how it all fell together? God is amazing. Uncle Allen said “I am sorry you had to go through your trial to prepare yourself for this ministry”.

It reminded me when I was first born again 11 years ago, I was so happy that I came to God on my own without any trials. Still, it took me 3 days and 3 nights of crying over the baggage of sin I carried till the time he forgave me but at that moment I wasn’t in any trial. Christians always proclaim that sometimes God puts you in a trial so you can learn and discover how much you need Him. Well, 11 years ago, I wasn’t facing any trial but I still needed Him and I was proud of that fact. :)

Now, comparing that time and now, I must say, a trial made me escalate so much more in faith and with a stronger desire to evangelise. I remember I was so passionate to share Christ the last time too but because it wasn’t life and death, I wasn’t exposed to other Christian groups and I was still in my bondage of fears and not knowing how to break free from it! So, even though I had a passion to evangelise, it all died down quickly as I did not know how to move further due to my fears. Now, that I’ve learned how to pray in authority and the power of binding and loosing and learning to die to self daily, discovering everyday the meaning of God’s grace that I am able to be led by the holy spirit. It’s like a crash course in Christianity over 4 months! But also because of the life and death situation that I got to meet so many pastors from many churches and learning so much from them!

I pray that you will be as adventurous and just yearn to learn more about Jesus. Do not put hindrances of unbelief or doubts before you as it will prevent you from locking 100% with Jesus and you will always wonder how come miracles only happen to others. I learned that the holy spirit will give you the ability to discern even if you jump into the unknown (where previously you think it is too charismatic)! It helps to have a steady partner like Henry so in a way, it is also good to have your Baptist friends standing beside you! :)

Check out our new ministry “2nd Chance” at http://www.my2ndchance.info/

In this ministry, we bring a message of hope, healing and life to people diagnosed with cancer, regardless of what stage they are in, religious belief, racial or family background. I had my second chance in life because of Jesus. He can do the same for you too.

A Vision for Aunty Beverly

During the praise and worship session at Deeper Life Seminar I saw a vision for Aunty Beverly. This time it is really a vision rather than a strong impression. They were all pictures.

1. I saw a very weak Aunty Beverly (weak, because her head was slumped forward) being lifted up by angels and an impression of Psalm 91 hit me. I could see why because her feet were not touching the ground.

Psalm 91:11-12
"For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways;
they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone. "

2. I saw a coffin under her and I saw an axe with fire. I handed the axe to the angels (because they do battle in the spiritual realm) and it struck the coffin and smashed and burned to ashes;

3. I saw "victory" and "testify" and Aunty Beverly took the word "testify" into her spirit.

4. I rejoiced and praised God! Hallelujah!

This morning, I heard from Elaine that she is in good spirit and could even chat and joke last night. Praise the Lord for her high spirits. I stand firm and continue to claim God's promises for Aunty Beverly that "By His stripes, Anunty Beverly is healed". The world will always show negative report in situations like this but God's will (logos) is to heal, to grant us long life. Plus, I am thrilled that now, Aunty Beverly has 2 "words" from Hamir and myself that she will live and testify of God's glory and goodness in January. Victory is in her hands despite the circumstance but we choose to listen to God's words OVER the circumstance. Please hold hands with me and claim this together in Jesus' name. Amen! I will be meeting Aunty Beverly today with Elaine. Please pray that the holy spirit will guide me to say the right words, not mine but His. I am bold as a lion..I am as bold as a lion..I am as bold as a lion (Proverbs 28:1)...

Dear Stephen

Hi cousin! Thanks for your encouragement. :) I pray you will be able to find your mum's bible and ride the high waves with me! You just need to let go to Him and I guarantee you it will not be disappointing! If your mum's bible is a King James Version, I would suggest you to get an easier bible to read. I started off with a "New Living Translation" bible. Man, it was so easy to read and so light and small, I carried it everywhere to read, even while waiting for my pizza take away order. I wrapped it up tho' so no one would look at me weirdly. That was 11 years ago!

Bibles have their own story. Like I shared with you, the bible that I am reading does not even belong to me. I found it at the back cupboards behind the PA- sound system. Nobody seemed to claim it and it was always there when I couldn't find a bible at the pews right at the back of the church. One day, I took it home. Only because, I was starting my quiet time at home although very slowly. I felt more comfortable with this bible I found in church because after the sermons, some passages stuck to me and I can roughly remember which part of the bible, top right or bottom left of the page. I always have in mind to get a similar bible and return this bible to the person. Believe it or not, his name and handphone number is in the bible and his address is in Penang!

After going through so much adventure with God, I really really would like to return him this bible with my tags and all to show him how wonderful his bible has helped me through this journey and I ma sure he would be pleased to know how his bible has helped someone be healed from cancer! :)

So, last Friday, when dear Dennis Liew offered to get the bible from me from Canaanland, I said alright, please get it from me. Everytime, when I step into a bookstore I can't decide what to buy. My ideal bible would be a pink bible, not too big but large printed. There is no such bible and I keep walking out of the bookstore empty handed, disappointed each time. When Dennis offered to get for me, I did not hesitate! He has gotten me a pink bible (a girl's backpack bible) in NIV version! I know I know I can't have everything. I think it would have to be two bibles to satisfy me. But thanks to Dennis. It is certainly a joy to see Dennis come out from his discouragement over the church crisis and now so passionate with Christ once again and I mean really passionate!

So, dear cousin, I pray for a perfect labourer to come across your path to take you to a church that will really speak to you and may you accelerate and surf with God! :)

G'day cousin. Love you!

The Message is Getting Stronger - Part 6 "Eugen's vision"

I am not sure how to write this but I pray the holy spirit will guide me. This evening has been heady, I have been swept off my feet. I jumped up and down with excitement. I shared with my mum the vision given to me by my friend Eugen Krahn. I was breathless! Then, it didn’t stop there. I shared the vision with Hamir and also the news of baby Megan and Aunty Beverly and Hamir’s words to me left me even more breathless that I shared the news immediately to Henry, Anita and Aunty Beverly!

In the beginning of my journey, God gave me His peace. He gave me His word to me to open my mouth and speak to FBC not to be so inward looking for there’s so much to do for His Kingdom. Because of this, He has given me boldness to you to tell of you of things to come then. This evening I cried reading Isaiah 48:16:

""Come near me and listen to this: "From the first announcement I have not spoken in secret; at the time it happens, I am there."And now the Sovereign LORD has sent me, with his Spirit."

Yes, “From the first announcement I have not spoken in secret”. I shared with you “Wait for a miracle and believe” and to join me in an adventure with God. I didn’t know where it was leading to. I had blogged “The Message is Getting Stronger- Part 1 to 5”. Yet, I did not share with you this part that I received word that God will use me to send revival to First Baptist Church. Because I didn’t know how He was going to use me. I just said to Him “I stand here ready to do your will. I will take baby steps to come forth and speak. Guide me with your holy spirit because I am not brave enough to speak”. How will God use me. It seems rather bold and proud to say it even. I received these words from Hamir and Steven from 19 July 2009 onwards. I knew that God wanted to use me to speak to FBC but to hear that He wanted to use me to send revival? Wow!

Now, four months later, dear Eugen Krahn confirms these words with a detailed vision! Wow! I am blown away! It gave me a better glimpse of what is to come and how revival would take place. Given the current situation, there is a sense of hopelessness because of the different factions. Last night, during quiet time, I told myself to stop thinking like that because if all thought like me, there will be no hope for reconciliation, restoration or revival! So, I prayed a prayer speaking life to FBC that they will be like the brothers in Galations praising God for Paul in Galations 1: 23-24. It struck me that in that Galation church where Paul preached, there had to be people whose family members were persecuted and killed by the commandment by Paul (then Saul). There should be hatred. There should be anger for being wronged (like what FBC is going through). But they looked beyond all that and all they saw was the heart of Christ, they saw God’s heartbeat and suddenly even all the pain seem dimmer.

Galations 1: 23-24;
“They only heard the report: "The man who formerly persecuted us is now preaching the faith he once tried to destroy." And they praised God because of me.”

This is what Eugen “saw”:

1 - I saw Liz at the entrance door of FBC Panthai, many FBC members including some church leaders were present too. I was there as well and also a few other folks who did not appear to be from FBC because they had different theological beliefs about the “moving in the spirit” and about “healing”.

2 – People prayed for Liz and she got healed of cancer. I can’t tell if the healing was instant or complete but it was considered “supernatural” and this started heavy controversy among FBC members with many suddenly starting to repent of their past beliefs and attitudes about the power of the Holy Spirit.

3 – There appeared to be some sort of quarrelling or even splitting – not sure about that. Most remarkably there was a conviction of heart, repentance and some sort of “revival” mentality within FBC people.

This vision was in July 2009.

This evening I was blown away by other words from Hamir after I shared with him about Baby Megan and Aunty Beverly.

A few days ago, while I was praying for Baby Megan and after praying in understanding and in the spirit, I heard a faint sound “She will be healed”. Then later I saw a vision of a 4 year old girl in a dress. She looked well and I asked in my mind “Are you Baby Megan” and she said “It’s me, it’s me” waving. I was wondering whether to share this vision. What if it does not come true? But the vision means she will be healed and the fact that the vision is no longer a 4 month old but a 4 year old shows means she will continue to grow up healthily. Still, it took me 2 days to finally claim it in Jesus’ name. I don’t know why I was so stunned and uncertain, it did not occur to me to just claim it because it is good news! When I shared with Hamir he said “While you were speaking I sensed that she will live. Don’t worry, she will live. All her parents need to do is to surrender all to God and to take the risk in faith”. I prodded more on the difficult decision the parents have to make – take away the breathing machine or a surgery that will make her require medical aid for the rest of her life. He said, don’t worry, she will be alright. It was as if they wouldn’t even need to face that decision. I claim it in Jesus’ name!

Yesterday afternoon, I walked upstairs to get some rest and suddenly, I heard the phone ring and then, a message came in. I put it to silent so I could sleep but decided to check the email. I read the news of Aunty Beverly’s lungs filled with 350ml water and the max allowed before discharge is only 200 ml. She is currently in a hospital in Singapore to remove fluid from her lungs. I went up to sleep but I tossed and turned. I just could not sleep. The holy spirit was prompting me to pray. So, I had to walk downstairs and took my handphone upstairs and started to pray and as I prayed typed it into the handphone to a few people to pray along with me. That explains why some of you received a sms from me! Thanks for the Amen! It’s a prayer in agreement taking place! Praise the lord! Later in the evening, Henry received news from Tet Shin that the second tube to the lungs was removed! Praise the Lord! It’s a miracle! He is a prayer answering God. Then we received news of fluid in her stomach which I continue to claim healing for her. Anyway, I shared this with Hamir and again he said “While you were speaking, I sense that Aunty Beverly will be healed. All she needs to do is speak out “Lord Heal me! I believe” and she will see a miracle happen. She will be healed before January. About 1 ½ months ago, Hamir was praying for Aunty Beverly with me and he told me “My word to you is you will live but for Aunty Beverly, she has to work it out with God first”. I sense the fiery darts of the devil working against her and it becomes worse when she is in pain. It is understandable. I was so afraid to share with her but finally, King Wai and I managed to pray with her and share some bible verses with her. These days I sense she is spiritually stronger so I dare agree to with Hamir. So, again, I was so excited that I shared with Aunty Beverly!

I don’t know where all this is going my friends. I just know that the spirit guides me, I discern, I send out the message. I say it over and over again. He will send people to help you. He will speak to you in His word, in sermons. God speaks to us. His sheep hears His voice!

What God is trying to tell you today is he has revealed all this ahead of time so that you will believe that it is from Him. He also wants you to know as per Isaiah 48:17 “….I am the LORD your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go.”

He wants you to be led by the holy spirit and the only way that you can be led by the holy spirit is if you understand what “God’s grace” means. Grace is supernatural because it is a gift from God. Our flesh makes it difficult for us to understand as we always go back to head knowledge of what’s best for us, what’s best for FBC. But He said he will teach us what is best for us, what is best for FBC. He will direct us the way we should go! See my blog “The Blood of Jesus - I am “faith”ing”. It took me that long to finally understand what grace means too but once we do, it is so powerful! We just let God guide us! Then, we can just rest in Him. Even that, I am still learning – to rest in Him.

Then, we wouldn’t use our head knowledge to persecute every detail that we don’t like happening in FBC. The issue of who’s right and who’s wrong grows dimmer as we see God’s heartbeat and I can tell you, God’s heartbeat is not in those issues that we are currently debating upon in FBC. It is found in Isaiah 58:

"Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:
to loose the chains of injustice
and untie the cords of the yoke,
to set the oppressed free
and break every yoke?

7 Is it not to share your food with the hungry
and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—
when you see the naked, to clothe him,
and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?

8 Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness will go before you,
and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.

Yes, then, healing will quickly appear, there will be revival in FBC, we will live by God’s grace and the glory of God will be our rear guard.

Miracle Rally 31 October 2009 Saturday 7 pm 51A/221

Wow! I can't believe it! I will be graduating soon. I was pleasantly surprised that there would be a miracle rally as part of the Deeper Life Seminar. It will be held on 31 October 2009, a Saturday at 7pm. All are invited. I will be a student during the miracle rally, and being part of the many teams involved in this miracle rally. It's big! There will be miracle healing choir, wall of fire (that's my team!), deliverance team, miracle healing team, salvation team and not to mention, usherers and parking attendants. Each have a role to play but it will be ministered by Rev. Dr Vernon Falls. He has ministered in over 100 nations of the world with mighty signs, wonders, miracles and gifts of the Holy Spirit.

My team (Wall of Fire)'s will be praying the whole time (4 hours) we are there, so no chance to be with you guys. :( But I am sure you will be so filled with God's presence, you won't need me by your side and I will be praying very hard for all of you. Even as far as 2 weeks ago, our team has been praying for all aspects of the Miracle Rally and the prayer time alone is awesome. Led by Angeline Sung, I am beginning to learn how to pray in authority as well. We start out in praying in the understanding for each prayer and then ask for the holy spirit to lead us in a perfect prayer in which we start to pray in tongues. Sometimes, I am filled with tears because even though we pray for healing for people out there, I am also receiving healing because of the presence of the holy spirit.

If you have never been to a miracle rally and if you know of loved ones, friends who need healing (from sickness, emotional problems, relationship problems, financial problems), salvation, deliverance from bondages etc, please bring them along. After I read Katherine Kuphlan's book, I finally understood how a miracle rally works (see my blog "Eelech - No power whatsoever"). I always thought it was some powers given by God to the healer. I've been to 2 other rallies before and both brought me to tears filled with the holy spirit! So, it doesn't matter if we understand or not, it is really experiencing God's awesome power, God's awesome presence and watch miracles happen and even to you too! Because, I finally understand, that it is the holy spirit that heals. Sometimes, it takes just a word that the pastor speaks and *poof* or *ting* (gently) you are healed because the holy spirit touched your heart. It's so beautiful. It doesn't matter if you are an unbeliever or not. God is for all. He loves us so much. I just pray you will be able to find the place and get a car park. Oh, someone, please bring Aunty Beverly. Kim Kee, please bring your mum. Please share this with Alison, Dr Mano, Sandra Chong and Nancy. Karen, please bring your frined's uncle. Even those facing relationship challenges or depressed, come. For those who does not know Jesus, come and witness His awesome power and believe. :)

Miracle Rally

Venue: Renewal Luthran Church (under the Lifeline International Ministries)

Lot 5, Jln 51A/221

Petaling Jaya

Time: 7 pm

Map: Click here

http://www.streetdirectory.com/malaysia/kl/travel/travel_id_10129/travel_site_157282/?x=792865.29&y=342724.38&l=7&s=kl

Parking information

Parking within the church is reserved for the elderly, the infirm, families with children and newcomers. You can park near the church or a parking lot marked prominently as "RLC Parking" along Jalan 223. Shuttle vans run every 5-7 minutes an hour before and after the service. On rainy days, please drop passengers at the main porch of the church. If you are walking alone to the vehicle, feel free to ask for an escort at the guard house.

Directions:

With Jaya Supermarket on your left, Jaya 33 on your right, go straight till you reach traffic lights. Turn left at the traffic lights (mosque on left) and go straight till you reach another traffic lights. Go straight till u reach another traffic lights but just keep going straight. No need to stop at lights. Go straight for quite some distance on Jln 223 until you see a no entry signboard on your left ahead of you (means you can drive no further). Take a left turn BEFORE that signboard. Follow the bend until You reach RLC church on your right. Turn in and drive past the front of the building till you turn into car park on your right.

This is for Anita - "Faith is NOW"

This is for Anita, a dear friend of mine in Christ. Anita’s Shen Leng and my dear little Nicholas used to play together when they were toddlers. Anita would say Shen Leng will serve in the concern ministry and I will say Nicholas would serve in the worship ministry! Seeing how much Shen Leng has grown up recently at the town hall meeting amazes me. Of course, that meant Nicholas is also that much taller! How fast they have grown. I hear Shen Leng is down with dengue fever and admitted yesterday (19 October 2009) into Damansara Specialist Hospital. I also suffered dengue in January 2008 but recovered quickly after 3 days in the hospital. So I remember the weakness in the body, the lethargy, the achy bones (like flu coming on), fever and the taste buds all screwed up. The good thing is that 100 plus is recommended! I heard with joy that Shen Leng accepted Christ last year at an early age of 6! This little girl is really matured as she accepted Christ on her own accord. But this year she has been in and out flu, glandular fever and now dengue fever. I heard that she is very angry with God for not healing her and despite her prayers, she still has to get hospitalised. Sounds like us when we are discouraged but she is only a little girl. What troubled me and amazes me that the devil does not look at how young and old you are. The condemnation has already begun for her at this tender age! How vicious and how evil the devil is!

Father in heaven, I bind all spirit of sickness, bad virus, bad bacteria, all disease, deceit, lies, condemnation and ALL work of darkness working against Shen Leng and break it in the name of Jesus! I speak restoration to her body for all her cells and organs to return to normal. I command all her cells and organs to receive the nutrients and be nourished to build her immune system so strong to fight , kill and destroy all the bad bacteria and bad viruses in her in the name of Jesus! And I ask for the blood of Jesus to flow through her right now right now and restore her completely and make her whole again. I pray all this with faith, believing that you have heard my prayer and receive it with thanksgiving in Jesus’ name!

I want to share with Anita what I have learned last night from Deeper Life Seminar. It is what I have been believing throughout this journey but now, it has been broken down to steps we can follow! Wow! It is the first principle of faith – To agree with God. How do we do it?

1. To receive the word of God, to accept it not as word of men but as it actually is, the word of God (1 Thessalonians 2:13). Just receive it as truth.

1 Thessalonians 2:13
“And we also thank God continually because, when you received the word of God, which you heard from us, you accepted it not as the word of men, but as it actually is, the word of God, which is at work in you who believe.”

2. Mix gospel with faith i.e. simply believing what God says.
(Hebrew 4:2)

“For we also have had the gospel preached to us, just as they did; but the message they heard was of no value to them, because those who heard did not combine it with faith.”

3. Be “..fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised (Romans 4:21). eg If I asked you your name and you answer “Anita”, could anyone convince you that your name is “Jackie”? No, right? Likewise, be FULLY persuaded what God says in His word. If you were travelling a familiar route and yet, when someone tells you of another route you could take, you might panic and take a wrong turn and get lost in it awhile before coming back out again. When we are not fully persuaded, we leave room for doubts. When we are fully persuaded, we leave no room for doubts, no room for unbelief.

Romans 4:19
19And being not weak in faith, he considered not his own body now dead, when he was about an hundred years old, neither yet the deadness of Sarah's womb.

Abraham did not consider his circumstances (similarly, our diseases, our finances etc). By considering our circumstances, we will think it, talk about it and see it. The end result is what we say we have become. But Abraham did not consider his circumstances. It did not weaken His faith. Instead:

- He said what God said;
- He thought what God thought;
- He saw what God saw

Start considering Shen Leng, Aunty Beverly, baby Megan, Alison, Dr Mano, Sandra Chong, even myself healed. Start declaring it, start thinking it, start seeing them healed and they will be healed despite the circumstances!

In Genesis 13:14-17, God gave Abram a vision of what He promised. God spoke to Abram, gave him a vision and gave him a promise for Abraham (who he was to become). It’s like God telling Abram “This is what I want you to see, think and speak”.

Genesis 13:14-17
"The LORD said to Abram after Lot had parted from him, "Lift up your eyes from where you are and look north and south, east and west. All the land that you see I will give to you and your offspring forever. I will make your offspring like the dust of the earth, so that if anyone could count the dust, then your offspring could be counted. Go, walk through the length and breadth of the land, for I am giving it to you.""

Genesis 15:5
“He took him outside and said, "Look up at the heavens and count the stars—if indeed you can count them." Then he said to him, "So shall your offspring be." “

If we look at the stars and try to reenact what God told Abraham, you will start counting and chances are, you will start counting it aloud until you give coz there’s just too many. Say it. Declare the vision God gives you. Declare the Word God gives you. Be fully persuaded – consider it by saying, thinking and seeing what God says to you.

4. Don’t look at yourself. Don’t look at your resources, your abilities but look at Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith. Look at what God says. Hebrew 12:2

5. Faith is NOW. This is a revelation to me. Faith is now. Hope is future.

It makes sense to me now why praying with faith causes us to see miracles. Having faith and hoping are two different things. Hope is “joyful expectation”. If we prayed just hoping, you can be sure our prayers won’t get answered especially if our minds are not in agreement with our prayers. We hope for a miracle but we aren’t sure God will deliver. But faith is what makes hope that is in the future happen. Faith is believing NOW it will happen not after it happened. Faith in Jesus who paid the price, who destroyed death. The power of the holy spirit who raised Jesus from the dead is in us because we are heirs and co-heirs with him, seated at God’s right hand. We have been given all authority. We are overcomers. We need to release this power, that power that is in us as a child of God.

That’s why when we pray, we pray believing that we have received it by faith, despite the circumstances. He hears our prayers. We know it because the bible says so (1 John 5:14,15). And then thank God (Phil 4:6), keep thanking Him every day. He will give us what we ask. Just watch for the miracles!

Here’s blessing you with 4 praise songs.
“I exalt Thee” at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-lY8VQpSTY by Chris Quilala / Jesus Culture and “Yes Lord” at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yM-RAe8HHE&feature=related.
“Here Am I to Worship” at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eiy3_KRKNaQ (see also video bar)
"Worthy is the Lamb" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AR4CCLnmf1Q&NR=1

Ethan is blessed, protected and healed!

This is another testimony of God’s amazing love for us each time that we just acknowledge Him first in our lives. I just need to share with you after also learning that we are to testify and magnify His name. He enjoys our praises so what God loves, I will also do. :)

On Saturday afternoon, 17 October 2009, Henry and I decided to take the kids to the club for a swim. Wow, we have not swum since our holiday in Kuantan (just shortly before my diagnosis in June 2009). My mum told me not to not take them out since they have not fully recovered from cough. But, I hardly hear them cough except in the early mornings where they have dry throats. Ethan had a WEE bit of sniffles but I told my mum if we were to wait for them to get completely well, it might be a long way from now because something always seemed to come up. So, we will go in faith. Nicholas and Ethan were overjoyed. Ethan recognizes the big swim bag and he knows that colorful bag means we are off to the waters! Alas, it started to pour at 3.30pm. Nicholas started to feel anxious because he knows we won’t get to swim if it rains. I told both of them to start praying and within 30 minutes the rain stopped! Praise the Lord!

On the way to the club we prayed that the kids will have a great time and that He will protect the children from any bugs thereafter. We claimed Psalm 91. We reached the club and then we saw one spot of rain on the windscreen. Then we heard thunder and saw flashes of lightning. We prayed "Lord, please make the thunder and lightning go away". It did seem the rain was moving away. After the kids changed, it started to drizzle. Henry told me to wait at the covered restaurant above the pool. So, I saw the kids having a blast of a time, bopping up and down, splashing water, running through all the series of pools, sliding etc. I was hawking them from the restaurant…he he..you know, just to be sure because both the kids can't swim. It was Deepavali and the restaurant was awfully quite. Only a voice from a friendly gwai loh who spoke loudly across the table, “Your young lads in the water?” he smiled.

It drizzled for a whole hour and that whole time the kids were playing in the pool, enjoying themselves to bits with Henry. Even Ethan got a little braver and finally stood in the deeper kids pool and bopped up and down confidently in his swimming vest. I noticed too he has grown taller! The thunder got further and further away and there wasn’t any lightning, just drizzle. I was worried for the kids but still confident He would grant us our prayers.

As soon as we finished dinner, got into the car and Ethan had his milk, Ethan fell asleep and continued sleeping at home. As he was sleeping on the bed, I heard him toss and turn because he started having a bit of difficulty breathing. I said to myself“uh oh, this is it – stuffed nose". But I prayed and propped him up on the pillow to breathe better but he still tossed and turned and whined. Miraculously, after a short while, he started breathing better and slept till the next morning! I was so touched by God’s love for Ethan. I thanked Him continuously, over and over again. He assured me that He loves Ethan and Nicholas more than I did! I only need to focus on Him. I was reminded again of God’s great love for us – I cried. I woke up at 3 am Sunday morning to give Him praise and glory and He blessed me with heavy rain – thunder and lightning and all! If you know me very well, you will know I love the rain, I love very heavy rain. I love to see lightning! Because it reminds me of God’s greatness and might. As long as I am safe in the house or in a car and I can enjoy in my safety, I love it. It lasted for one whole hour, throughout the length of my devotion. He knows I love heavy showers and lightning!
And praising God at wee hour in the morning also prepared my heart for worship at 11am. Thank you William for your worship leading. It was awesome. I was blessed. Tears were flowing and I felt God’s awesome presence. It was your prayers, your praises to God, the songs chosen and the lyrics that spoke to me. Yes, Jesus, You are name above all names. There is power in Your name. There is power in your Word. There is power in the blood of Jesus. And we can all receive healing because you have made it possible for all of us to be overcomers because of what You did on the cross. We have victory now. All praise be to His name!

Thank You

Hey Jacqui and Hwok Aun, thanks so much for your blessing and for the lovely card. I was almost in tears reading your card because what Isaiah 55:11 says is true – “11 so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.” To know that this is God’s desire and to see God move your heart, people’s hearts - this moves my heart in return and increases my faith in Him. God is good all the time. My hugs and kisses to Kieran. :)

Thank you Ted and Stella for the big box of activated barley and for your generous blessing! I've been taking the activated barley with my beverages. It taste exactly like barley and if I mix it with lemon and honey it is like "yee mai shiun kam"! :) Thank you George Tee for once again laying hands on me and praying for me. Thank you Fee for your blessings of fresh vege. My mum is trying to grow a herb garden for me and I see it growing, slowly but surely. Thank you mummy for coming back to look after me and caring for me! Thank you friends for calling me up and cheering me up. It is wonderful to be amongst family of believers, friends and family. Thank you Lord for all your blessings showered upon me and my family. Thank you Lord for everything!

God bless you all.

I’m resting in His love

Thanks Tammy for this lovely poem to God. I just have to share with all who are heavy in the heart or feeling down cast too. Thanks Steven Lee for reminding me to look at myself how God sees me and think the way God thinks about me. And it is His will to heal us, He has our best interest at heart because He loves us very much. Any other feelings are NOT from God and so I stand firm and refused to be discouraged or defeated.


I refuse to be discouraged
To be sad, or to cry;
I refuse to be downhearted,
and here’s the reason why…
I have a God who’s mighty,
Who’s sovereign and supreme;
I have a God who loves me,
and I am on His team.

He is all wise and powerful,
Jesus is His name;
Though everything is changeable,
My God remains the same.

My God knows all that’s happening;
Beginning to the end,
His presence is my comfort,
He is my dearest friend.

When sickness comes to weaken me,
To bring my head down low,
I call upon my mighty God;
Into His arms I go.

When circumstances threaten to rob me from my peace;
He draws me close unto His breast,
Where all my strivings cease.
And when my heart melts within me,
and weakness takes control;
He gathers me into His arms,
He soothes my heart and soul.

The great “I AM” is with me,
My life is in His hand,
The “Son of the Lord” is my hope,
It’s in His strength I stand.

I refuse to be defeated,
My eyes are on my God;
He has promised to be with me,
as through this life I trod.
I’m looking past all my circumstances,
To Heaven’s throne above;
My prayers have reached the heart of God,
I’m resting in His love.

I give God thanks in everything,
My eyes are on His face;
The battle’s His, the victory is mine;
He’ll help me win the race.

—- by Lita Kurtzer

Praising God – let the demons flee

Yesterday, 15 October 2009 was a bad day. I was feeling down because of the plehgm that did not seem to want to go away. It’s still green. I hardly cough though. Then I remembered what Deeper Life Seminar taught me..to refer to 2 Corinthians 5:7

“We live by faith, not by sight.”

If I was feeling discouraged and down cast, then I should choose to listen to what God says over my feelings. So, the whole day I carried this feeling in my heart but knowing that it is not from God. So, how then do I get rid of such feelings, I told myself? Since, I know it is not from God, then I know it must be from the devil to condemn me again.

I whipped out my bible and I recalled what Ps Joseph Prince from New Creation Church, Singapore said in his CD (see video bar also) – that we are blessed if we did what believing Abraham did. Abraham believed in God by faith. I remembered he said all the blessings which is mentioned in Deuteronomy continue to flow but the curses stop at the cross. So, I went looking for those blessings, and I found them in Deuteronomy 28:1-12. Deuteronomy 28:7 spoke to me.

“1 If you fully obey the LORD your God and carefully follow all his commands I give you today, the LORD your God will set you high above all the nations on earth. 2 All these blessings will come upon you and accompany you if you obey the LORD your God: …… 7 The LORD will grant that the enemies who rise up against you will be defeated before you. They will come at you from one direction but flee from you in seven.

I told God, “You said that if I follow you (and having received your grace), I will be blessed. You say in Deuteronomy 28:7 that you will grant that the enemies (cancer, cough, phleghm) who rise up against me will be defeated before me. They will come at me from one direction and flee from me in seven. I claim all this is Jesus’ name. Thank you Jesus for healing me.

I shared this with Henry in the evening and by then the condemnation had gotten worst. I was feeling uncared for and unloved which I know is not true and Henry confirmed it. Sweet Henry said a prayer for me and Nic took a picture of Henry and I together to cheer me up. Ethan sent me a picture of his drawing of mummy. All that lifted my spirit.

Before sleeping, I decided to talk to God again and even wrote a psalm for Him which is actually a copy of verses here and there to match the situation I was feeling.

“Praise be the Lord
Oh Lord my rock
The Lord is my strength and my shield
I call to you for help
Hear my cry for mercy
I will extol you, I exalt you
Praise the Lord with the harp
Oh Lord open my lips
And my mouth to declare your praise
Oh Lord, come quickly to help me
Why are you so downcast O my soul
Why so disturbed within me
Put your hope to God
For I will yet praise Him
My Savior and my Lord
God is my refuge and strength
All day long they conspire against me
They lurk
They watch my steps
Eager to bring down my soul
On no account let them escape
In your anger O God, bring down my enemies
My enemies will be destroyed
When I call for help
But this I know that God is for me
In God, whose word I praise
In the Lord, whose word I praise
In God I trust, I will not be afraid
My fortress, my loving God”

I read out again after writing it out and then I felt God’s presence, the Holy Spirit with me because I started crying. I kept thanking God over and over again. This experience confirmed what I learned at Deeper Life Seminar – that praising God will make demons flee from you. When God is with us, demons flee. In 2 Chronicles 20:22, Jehoshaphat was surrounded by 3 armies but the first thing he did was to inquire with God and then Jehoshaphat commanded his army to sing and praise God! Not even prepare for battle! Imagine! And when they began to sing and praise God, the Lord destroyed the enemy. It took them 3 days to pick up all the spoil after their enemies’ defeat.

"22 As they began to sing and praise, the LORD set ambushes against the men of Ammon and Moab and Mount Seir who were invading Judah, and they were defeated."

God enjoys our praises - we are to rejoice, sing, dance, make a joyful noise. We are to tell others too what Jesus has done in our lives. To testify. How often we keep quiet and not share of His wondrous works. We are to praise Him continually.

Hebrews 13:15
15Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise—the fruit of lips that confess his name.

Psalm 35:28
28 My tongue will speak of your righteousness and of your praises all day long.

That is an eye opener to me, a revelation to me. I thought we only worship continually in heaven. I thought we only praised him on Sundays. Now praise has a new meaning to me and yesterday night I experienced what it means to God and to me.

Amazingly, this morning it was like a rainbow had come up over the sky. I had 4 calls from friends and hubby this morning alone, encouraging me and just calling me up to see how I am doing. It’s like He had a lesson for me to learn. To live by faith not by sight. To obey God’s words over feelings. To meditate on His word. To praise Him. Thank you Lord for being so close to me teaching me everyday.

Foolish Ways of the World

Crazy crazy crazy. After my vivid dream on Monday morning of a girl parachuting to her death in a swimming pool, I just saw on CNN, Richard Heene who experimented with a disc like balloon and placed his son in there. It was broadcasted over big TV networks and even facebook had fan pages dedicated to 6 year old balloon boy, Falcon Heene. How crazy can a father get? All for what? Fame? Money? When they found the balloon, there was no box and the boy was missing. Guess where they finally found him – in the attic in his house all along. You can read further at:

http://edition.cnn.com/2009/US/10/15/colorado.boy.balloon/index.html?iref=mpstoryview

Video:
http://edition.cnn.com/2009/US/10/15/colorado.boy.world.watching/index.html?iref=topnews#cnnSTCVideo

“Foolish ways of the world” was the message I gotten from my dream. This is the closest to my dream. I hope it is a closed chapter.

Hangkai at Jonkers 2

The crab that I couldn't eat..the prawn that I couldn't eat..I ate multi grain rice that

I cooked from home with carrots, onion and wolfberries
An old well at Eleven Bistro, Jln Lekiu

One of the 3 Courtyards at Hotel Puri, Jonkers St

Ethan at another courtyard at Hotel Puri

Another view of the courtyard, mummy all contorted!

Hangkai at Jonkers

I had a little "hangkai" at Jonkers Street, Malacca over last Friday and Saturday with the family. It's my first overnight stay holiday since 30 June! I would normally be very organised about everything but this time I just decided to flow with Jesus. And how easy it is too because before I knew it, I had packed my clothes, the kids' clothes, all food stuff, prepared my own meal for lunch and dinner ahead of time. We stayed at Hotel Puri which is a quaint little hotel in the heart of Jonkers stay. It has a beautiful courtyard and the kids love playing there as well. The kids loved the trishaw rides, the boat ride and eating ice cream. We were pleasantly surprised by a roadside martial arts demonstration by a Mr Ho. He could flip playing card 2 storey high, eat fire and break a coconut with his index finger! Powerful! Ethan and Nic was enjoying their ice cream more. Thankfully, Ethan did not ask to be carried. Whew! It was quite easy this round which shows how grown up they all are now. Praise the Lord! The holiday did make the cough which I had gotten from Ethan worse. But thanks to your many prayers, the cough has subsided. I seldom cough but there is phlegm. All in all, I thank God for a restful holiday in Malacca and the joy of walking the streets of Jonkers with my family. :)

Testimony of Baby Megan

Baby Megan, baby of Diane Chai's friend in Singapore, went into a coma when she choked on her milk while breast feeding. It is so unreal but some were losing hope for her progress. Even Diane was getting prepared mentally to go down for the baby's funeral. I told Diane, don't speak death, speak life to her. I am so touched by news from Diane last week when she said "LiYen asks for continued prayer. Megan started moving a bit and has been doing so since Monday. She is still on ventilator but no meds. Continue to pray for miraculous healing! To God be the Glory."

God is great. This is our God. All His words are true. His promises are true. We only need to cling on to His words. God loves us very much. All glory be to God! Continue thanking God for healing baby Megan. :)

Update - Ring a Ring a Roses

My scalp was a mountain of activity, itchy and there was always some new zit somewhere on the scalp. The most painful one was when 5 to 6 zits appeared together at a go at the base of my skull. That got me fearful a bit. Praise the Lord, my scalp is no longer itchy and there are fewer zits these days!

Last week, I went for my first facial during this trial. After the facial, my skin developed redness. I think it is because my skin is too sensitive from all the goodness from the facial. It was red and getting a bit itchy too. Thanks Zandra for the timely aloe vera! On top of that, I developed cough from being infected by Ethan over the week. Worst of all, my mum had to look after some emergency matters at her home and could not be with me for a week and a half. I was getting quite discouraged but had a holiday in Malacca to look forward to last week end. It was a great holiday with Henry and the kids and just resting in the Lord. I did not plan any schedule and just went with the flow. I did have a schedule in my mind though but decided to just play by ear!

By Monday, 12 October 2009, I told myself I had better take a rest. With no mummy and having to prepare meals by myself and forcing myself to nap in between, I decided to cook simple meals. Then diarheoa developed on Monday and I sought prayers from you. I also had a vivid dream that morning. It was a foul mouthed girl that parachuted to her death in a swimming pool. She even carried a digital camera to shoot her fall and it was played over TV for all to see. As she hit the pool, she actually turned around and waved for help but went unconscious shortly after and sunk right down the pool and hit her head on the stairs. I had a good look at her face. Her face was twitching as she drowned and her right fingers were moving. I felt sad for her and I am not sure what the dream was about. It was a very clear dream since I could see details and the message I got from this whole ordeal was "The foolish ways of the world".

Going to Deeper Life Seminar really helped me back to my feet again. I realised that even though I am healed, the devil will always find ways to bring me down. I realise I should turn my back on the symptoms because will not go away as long as I look at them. It's like the devil playing ring a ring a roses with me. Everytime a symptom goes away, another one hits me. It's awful. So I had a heavy session of rebuking everything evil or nasty from me this morning and trampling on scorpions and serpents. I even visualised some snakes slithered out of my house. After that, I coughed out green pleghm followed by white pleghm and even white foam! Praise God! I commanded my lungs and all cells and organs to praise God!

Going back to God's words always brings peace to me again. Last night, I memorised Romans 8:38 so that I will always remember His great love for me. "I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels or demons, neither the present not the future, nor any power, neither heights nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

And if God loves me this much, he will have my best interest at heart. It is His will to heal me. Exodus 15:25 He said "I am the Lord that healeth thee". 1 Peter 2:24 "by his wounds you have been healed". Psalm 107:20 "He sent forth his word and healed them".

Thank you Lord for healing me. Thank you Lord for you are my healer. Thank you Jesus for your death on the cross. That same power of resurrection that raised You is in me now and I am an overcomer in You. Thank you Jesus for making me righteous with God.

Thank you for returning my mummy to me. Today, my skin is no longer red and my skin is quite smooth too! Praise the Lord! Today, I can blog because my mum is preparing my meals for me! Praise the Lord! God is good all the time! I magnify Your name!

My Life is a Testimony

I shared with Henry's cousin last night that I just believed in Jesus and what He has done for me on the cross 2000 years ago, that he not only bore my sins but also took my sickness away and I just cling on to His promise that by his wounds, I have been healed. Past tense. That's the amazing part of God's word, we can cling on to His promises because He is a God that cannot lie.

She told me she was glad to see myself resolved within to just pick up and just move on. I went home pondering that line. It wasn't that I picked myself up but letting myself go to Jesus who then picked me up. It wasn't a mind game that I have to stay happy so that endorphins can be churned but reliance on God's promises and there is power in His word! By stretching my hands out to receive His grace, He stretched out His hand and pull me out of the pit. That's why the healing process has begun and I choose to look at His finished work on the cross. He says "It is finished". There is nothing else for me to do but to believe. By receiving His grace, He gives me also the wisdom to handle this situation eg asking for prayers, taking advise from family and friends, nutrition, type of chemo, exercise, taking rest, getting sunshine, not being stressed etc but never the other way round first. Anything else would be on my strength and I would continue to be under the curse, fallen away from grace again (see my blog on "Blood of Jesus - I am "faith"ing). I know it is difficult to understand but here is a song by Marvin Sapp that speaks my heart too, even his opening words are so true. Click the video bar on the right, lyrics below:


We Worship You Today

Verse 1:
My life is a testimony, my heart is an open vessel.
My will is the part that yields to Your will.
My walk is the way You lead me,
my talk is the words You feed,
my praise is the sweetest sound to Your ears.

Chorus: Hallelujah (3x), we worship You today.

Verse 2:
I live ‘cause You have allowed,
I give ‘cause You showed me how;
I’m here as a testimony to You.
There’s no place I’d rather be,
there’s no other God for me,
there’s no other name I give all the praise.

Chorus Vamp:
We worship, we worship, we worship,
we worship, we worship, we worship,
we worship, we worship, we worship,
we worship You today.

(Click http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XlXRbi3sSfc&feature=fvw)

How to Pray - Part 2

I was going through my notes on how to pray and the types of prayers from Deeper Life Seminar in preparation of the exam I had to do over the weekend which I did not do but finally completed it last night at 8pm, the time DLS class started! I told myself I would not get stressed over it and instead took my time to enjoy the study. While studying, I got so inspired to send the verses to Aunty Beverly. I sent out 9 smses! Thank God I didn’t get a scolding but instead a nice sms saying she was encouraged. Then, I got so encouraged, I sent the same verses to Min Yi who was also encouraged. So, I decided to send these verses to you to so that you can meditate on it and be blessed as well.

"Aunty Beverly, just want to share with you that i pray for u daily and thank Him for healing you because I claim His promise that whatever I ask I believe I have received it and it will be mine (Mark 11:24) Aunty Beverly, find a scripture that promise the answer and in Proverbs 4: 20-22 “God says my son pay to attention to what I say, listen closely to my words. Do not let them out of your sight keep them within your heart for they are life to those who find them and health to a man's whole body. Above all else guard your heart for it is de well spring of life.” Don't let any thots dampen you. It is not from God. Say, “I reject these thoughts in Jesus’ name. I choose to stand firm on God's word and it is his will to heal. 1 Peter 2:24 by His wounds you have been healed.” Choose God's words over feelings that contradict God's words."

"God said I will not violate my covenant or alter what my lips have uttered. (Psalm 89:34) That is de assurance that we can cling on to His promises n de confidence we have in approaching Him ( 1 john 5:14,15) Praise de Lord! :)"

"Everytime you feel pain you say to de devil, “de bible says I just need to stand firm (Ephesians 6:13) n I don't have to fight this battle because God said the battle belongs to Him (2 chronicles 20:15). Begone devil in Jesus' name!”"

"2 chronicles 20:17 - you will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions stand firm and see the deliverance. :) "

"But if I drive out demons by the spirit of God, then de kingdom of God has come upon u. Or again how can anyone enter a strong man's house unless he first ties up de strong man? Then he can rob his house. (Matt 12:28, 29)"

"Luke 10:18,19 I saw satan fall like lightning from heaven. I have given you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all power of de enemy, nothing will harm you. Aunt Beverly, that is de authority God has given us to rebuke the devil, to drive it away, to bind it, to cast it out. Then just focus on His love, de price he said. De grace given. De right standing before God. We r his children. He will answer all our prayers. 1 john 5: 14, 15 knowing it is his will to heal. In fact he overcame our disease borne our sickness 2000 years ago. :) yay! Praise de Lord!"

"By de blood of Jesus we are made righteous before God. We have right standing before God now. And de bible goes on to say 'the prayer of a righteous man is powerful n effective. 'Isn't that awesome? that's why when we pray in that attitude that we have right standing before God our prayers are powerful n effective. :) i am so happy i found this verse tonight. Always thot someone was more righteous than me. Not true. We are now his children now de moment we accepted christ co heirs w christ. :)"

"Pray to de Father in de name of Jesus (John 16:23-24), believe de moment u pray (Mark 11:24), thank God for de answer (Philippians 4:6), come boldly upon de throne of grace (James 5:16-18), find scripture to meditate upon, watch out for negative thots - not from God reject it in Jesus' name, don't worry (1 Peter 5: 7), think of these things (Philippains 4:8), stand firm on God's word (Ephesians 6:13-14.) "

"One very important thing which I am still learning. De words we speak out, our thots must be in agreement to de meditation of our hearts, de prayers that we pray. (Ps 19:14)"

I pray you will all be blessed by the above verses.

Town Hall Meeting Day

Long time not been with you Shen Ling!

Let me show you - "Michael Jackson crotch dance"

Foam rod art

Avoiding the "angel" Ethan

It was all havoc at the creche. Sorry guys, I did my best. In the end, I think Man Hon's iphone helped! I am really happy that the holy spirit helped us stay back in church because I thought I would not be able to put in my vote if I had to send the kids back for baby sitting. In the end, even Min Yi and Wei Ling put in their votes too. Praise the Lord!

The Blood of Jesus - I am “faith”ing

I am beginning to put my faith in the blood of Jesus because I believe it is the blood of Jesus, the perfect lamb slain, that made me right with Father God. It is the blood of Jesus that set me free. He did it freely for me, because God loves me so much, it is a free gift to me. His grace is a free gift to me. The only thing I need to do is reach out and receive it.

Grace is getting the blessing that I do not deserve.

Mercy is not getting the punishment I deserve.

I am made right (righteous) by the blood of Jesus.

These are simple revelations from God but why do I constantly struggle? Because, grace is SUPERNATURAL, it is not from this world. It is a gift from God. And I need the HOLY SPIRIT daily to understand these simple revelations.

I say "daily" because somehow my mind has been conditioned to think “do good, get good”, “do bad, get beat” – the way of the world. Even Wendy’s friend told her “Why is it bad things happen to good people”. That is the way most people think, even us Christians.
But that is not what righteousness (right standing with God) is. That is not what grace is. In fact, I live under a curse if I continue to think like that. Although, Christ has redeemed me on the cross, I negate the cross everytime I have this “do good, get good”, “do bad, get beat” mentality. I forget what grace is! I need to be filled with the holy spirit daily to understand grace, to experience grace, to experience God’s love, to not fall under the curse again. And it happened to me this week – I was under the curse of the law! I have fallen away from grace again! The bible says it clearly.

Galations 3:10
10All who rely on observing the law are under a curse…”

Galations 5:4
4You who are trying to be justified by law have been alienated from Christ; you have fallen away from grace.

It is deep revelation for me to note that this is not just the laws of Moses but the works we do everyday “to do good, get good”.

Ethan was down with cough for the past 9 days. I myself developed slight cough over the weekend and by Monday morning, I had developed green phlegm, a sign of infection. The thing is both Henry and I have been praying for Ethan the rebuking and casting out way, in all kinds of prayers but the stubborn cough did not go away. Instead, I got infected too.

It was a hectic weekend too with lantern party, baby sitting the kids during the town hall meeting. I uploaded some pix to show you the havoc activity! Plus all the routine of a busy weekend surrounding the kids. Then, I was stressed because I could not do my devotion first thing in the morning because of the busy activity around me. Deeper Life Seminar (DLS) requires us to discipline ourselves to spend at least 1 hour 20 mins with God, singing praises (20 mins), thanking Him (5 mins), praying in tongues (20 mins), reading and studying the bible (20 mins), meditating His word and jotting notes (15 mins). Plus - I hadn’t finished my exam which had to be done after revising the notes. All this plus being overworked and coughing was making me all stressed! And stress is an open door for the devil to work its way in again! Thankfully, I just felt in my spirit to not go for the Deeper Life Seminar class Monday night because I just needed to rest. But no sooner I decided on this, condemnation and feeling guilty started hitting me but I put it aside. I decided to tell Elaine as she is my classmate. Amazingly, she volunteered to pick me up for class. I thank this dear sister of mine but the devil works in ways unimaginable. I decided to just rest on the Hamir’s gauge of "got peace no peace thing" – decision that gives peace is from God, decision with no peace plus guilt and condemnation is NOT from God.

I told the devil:

“You can stop condemning me for not praying correctly over Ethan”
“You can stop condemning and making me feel guilty for not doing my devotion the first hour after waking up”
“You can stop condemning me and making me feel guilty for not being able to complete my exam and passing up on time”
“You can stop condemning me that I won’t be able to pass up my devotion time table on time”
“You can stop making me feel guilty for not attending the 1 hour talk on miracles by Dr Lay and making me feel guilty that I will miss out on all these details”
..because I need to rest! I just want to spend time with God and talk to Him. Begone, devil in Jesus’ name! Amen!

I started my morning jog around the neighbourhood and then started praising God and continued my quiet time with Him even after I got home. I marveled that at the end of it, how I had a good time with the Lord, enjoying talking and singing to Him without any stress - just pure enjoyment, like a holiday with Jesus! PLUS, believe it or not, I still fulfilled the DLS criteria to do my devotion in the first hour after waking up. Amazing but true. I am in returned blessed because I placed my trust in Jesus 100%. I just followed Him and NOT allow the things that had to be done for the day to rule me! Yet, the outcome was the same and the feeling ecstatic – my heart is filled with love, joy and hope! I feel so blessed.

Henry called me in the morning and told me Ethan did not cough at bed time last night. That’s the first time! Praise the Lord! I also told Him that I have no more green phlegm today! Praise the Lord! The blessings continue to flow!

Those who have faith are blessed with believing Abraham. (Galations 3:9)
Abraham believed in justification (made righteous) by faith (Galations 3:8). Amazing! The bible foresaw God would justify the gentiles (not Jews) by faith. The gospel was announced in advance to Abraham long before the Jews received the law! And we are blessed with believing Abraham because we believe what He believed too – justification (made right with God) by faith. I have to keep explaining in brackets because words like righteousness and justification are just too big words for me!

Faith is from the greek word “Pistis”. It is a verb, an action word and if you translate it to English, it really means “faith”ing. So faith, on contrary, is not a set of beliefs like the world thinks. “Oh, what faith do you belong to”. Nope, faith is not a noun. It is a verb. Faith is believing in Jesus and what He did for us. Like believing Abraham, it is a continuous action of believing. Some days we wake up and it is not fine and dandy and we forget God’s grace. It IS possible, I know because I experienced it last week!

Now that I know that faith is a verb, I will ask the holy spirit daily to reveal himself to me and to explain to me “grace” again, so that everyday I can be renewed in mind to be more and more like Christ, so that I can fall in love with Jesus all over again, so that I can be born again, over and over again to experience His grace, His love and the most beautiful part is – blessings will flowwww! Be it love to others, sharing His word to others, receiving favor from men and God, prosperity, good health, deliverance from bad habits – blessings will flowwwwww! Hallelujah! Such great revelation!

The Blood of Jesus

From my journal on 2 October 2009:

Amazing revelation today. Actually King Wai had shared it with me before earlier in my journey but it seems it takes 5 to 6 times of telling me the same thing before I really understand what it all means! Dennis tells me statistically, it takes up to the 7th time of listening to the gospel before a person receives Jesus. Anyway, this amazing revelation is about the blood of Jesus and the state of our mind when taking communion. Incidentally, I went for a healing rally by Vera Lim at PJ Hilton recently with Alvin Foo and Elaine. Vera Lim explained to us and also showed clips of recent healings to demonstrate that the blood of Jesus heals. The blood of Jesus delivers and protects. I witnessed myself how she delivered 2 persons from ringing in their ears and healed a paralysed man in a wheelchair. His fingers could move a bit and he could rock his body to and fro. A lady suffering of lupus was also healed and for the first time she could bend her left leg with lesser pain. She rebuked the disease from her body and asked for the blood of Jesus to heal her. She told us we could do the same at home. Whenever we are sick, we can pour ourselves a glass of water, believe that it is the blood of Christ and drink it and be healed. Do the same with bread, the body of Jesus broken for us and by His wounds we are healed. We are to take the bread and "wine" with this attitude daily and we will be healed.

I shared with King Wai it's not that I don't believe in the blood of Jesus but I don't want to place my faith in the blood of Jesus as if it was some magic potion. My faith is in Jesus who broke his body, shed his blood for us so that we may now have right standing before God - not by what we have done, good works etc but by what Jesus did for us on the cross. And this Jesus, our God, was raised from the dead and we are all made alive in Him as well. Because we have right standing with God and we are His children, he will hear our prayers. He will fullfil His promises if we claim His promises. That's why receive whatever blessing we need be it healing, deliverance or prosperity.

I think Vera Lim has been pleading the blood of Jesus for so many years and her faith in Jesus keeps growing and growing each time she witnesses another healing. For me, I have to double check where my source is before I ask for the blood of Jesus to heal me. For her it is automatic, she sees the connection straight away. For me, I take baby steps...like this journey.

This morning, I decided to write down my prayers before praying . I picked this up from reading OMF Books' "World Prayer". This man prepares his prayers like sermon notes before he gets down with business with God. That is how much confidence he has that God will answer his prayers. After all, God told us to approach Him this way (1 John 5:14,15). With confidence that He hears us and because He hears us, He will give us what we ask of Him.

I'm writing all this after a facial at Curve, sipping "Body Builder" at Juiceworks. I feel so blessed today.

Oops, I have yet to reach this revelation for the day! I was praying in spirit when I remembered what King Wai said about the blood of Jesus and while praying in spirit, I flipped to 1 Corinthians 11:23-33 and read it in my mind. I learned this multi tasking technique in Deeper Life Seminar under Margaret Falls. I started to cry when I read verse 24 "This is my body which is for you". I have read it so many times but I never quite understand the penalty He had to pay for us. I did not know in addition to taking away my sins, he also took away my disease. We never have to get sick again. Even if we do, with His help, we can overcome it. Then I read this part "This cup is the new covenant in my blood". By His death, by shedding His blood and paying the price for us, we now have right standing before God. But it's not until this journey that I realised what righteousness or right standing before God means. I always thought that I am not worthy (I am a sinner) compared to say, Peter Lim. Let's ask Peter to pray becuase he is more righteous! That's all wrong thinking!

Because of what Jesus did for us, we are now made worthy. God sees us sinless, blameless, pure even though we are in a state of fallenness. That the beauty of our God. We only need to let Jesus be our Lord and saviour. He loves us so much. And in this love relationship, we can come in confidence (like Vera Lim) approaching God for whatever we need and we know He will answer us because the bible says so (1 John 5:14,15, Mark 11:24, John 16:23). "My Father will give you whatever you ask in My name. Ask and you will receive and your joy will be complete" Jesus said. This is the beautiful relationship we can have with God.

I still haven't come to the revelation part! It goes on to say how if we eat the bread and drink the cup in an unworthy manner, we are bringing judgment upon ourselves. This is the part that opened my eyes "That is why many among you are weak and sick and a number of you have fallen asleep". That's why we fall sick, that's why our children fall sick and we can't attend home groups, church etc, that's why I have cancer. First, we take our eyes off Jesus, then we take our eyes off His word, then we do things the way our limited mind thinks fit, worse, we become obsessed over certain things and punish our physical bodies as a result. Worst, we become spiritually dead (fallen asleep), we put God in a box, say our prayers but do not anticipate any miracle because we have lost understanding of how powerful and how loving our God is.

But with our right standing before God, we can ask whatever we need or desire for in Jesus lies the answer to every human need!

I used to think that when taking communion, I should be more reverent, be silent, think of Jesus and what He did, ask for forgiveness. I guess it all seems correct but only when I started this journey, did I really know what it meant for Jesus to pay the price for us. We are more than worthy now to come before Him because we are His children now. And that's the thankfulness in my heart to have when taking communion and to ask for forgiveness to align myself back to God again if I have in anyway lost focus in Him.